hu·mil·i·ty

humility
biblical definition:
Humility is the simplicity of seeing things as they are: that you are absolutely dependent on Christ the Head and Christ the Body.

recently i was blessed to have met some Instagram friends in REAL LIFE.
I was no longer going to be just a follower, a liker, insta-stalker, a commenter, internet friend. i was about to become real life friends and I could not wait.

we met for dinner to celebrate a mutual friends birthday.

as girls trickled in the local restaurant my excitement and anticipation grew.
long hugs were exchanged, conversations were shared, real laughter was heard, unfiltered smiles were seen, and all was good.

after dinner we headed to one of the girls houses for more dessert and a boat ride. while eating yummy dessert,sugary candies, a cold beverages, we floated on the calm lake water.
there was dancing, more conversations, loud laughter, tinkles on the water, story telling, music, mood lighting, and star-gazing.

some time during the night a few more personal conversations started. questions were asked, advice was given, and the joking began.

James 3:5-10 (NLT)
In the same way, the tongue is a small thing that makes grand speeches.
But a tiny spark can set a great forest on fire. And the tongue is a flame of fire. It is a whole world of wickedness, corrupting your entire body. It can set your whole life on fire, for it is set on fire by hell itself.
People can tame all kinds of animals, birds, reptiles, and fish, but no one can tame the tongue. It is restless and evil, full of deadly poison. Sometimes it praises our Lord and Father, and sometimes it curses those who have been made in the image of God. And so blessing and cursing come pouring out of the same mouth. Surely, my brothers and sisters, this is not right!

God created us each unique. each with a different personality, different gifts, different convictions, different up bringing, and different filters.

sometimes i forget not everyone is like me. not everyone jokes like i do. not everyone goes all deep and messy when meeting for the first time. not everyone is open and comfortable with all conversation topics.  although alone in a more personal setting most conversations with the right friends can be completely harmless, even encouraging. Sometimes certain topics are just off-limits to some people. these topics can make people feel uncomfortable and even embarrassed.

that’s what happened. i contributed and furthered a conversation that hurt someone and made someone really uncomfortable. to them the conversation was inappropriate and not needing to be discussed.  i put my new friend in a place of uneasiness.

it hurts
it hurts knowing i was the cause of someones anxiety. i was the cause of the unsettled feelings inside their stomach.

in the past i would have brushed it off and attributed it to their problem, not mine. But The Lord has asked me to be humble, to acknowledge others. to think of them before me. to admit when i have done wrong and ask for forgiveness.
i needed to kneel before my father and repent for seeking my own enjoyment before my friends feelings.

i am sharing this with you today because i wanted to let you know that life is hard, it’s messy, and we can not do it alone.  I want you to learn from the mistakes i have made.

i have been greatly convicted lately about my actions. especially with my words. i am not the best at thinking before speaking or typing. I have hurt a couple of friends in recent weeks because i thought i was being funny. I thought my flippant joke was okay. but it’s not. i have created gaps in new friendships. I have caused people to feel the need to step back and reconsider. i know that it’s those times in my life that i have taken control of my actions and my words. I had not honestly and earnestly prayed that God would protect our conversations and the words i would speak.  I did not ask God to allow me to see my friends through His eyes, to see when i needed to guide the conversation, when i need to hold back the comment, or when i just need to step back.

Matthew 12:33-37 (NCV)
People Know You by Your Words
“If you want good fruit, you must make the tree good. If your tree is not good, it will have bad fruit. A tree is known by the kind of fruit it produces. You snakes! You are evil people, so how can you say anything good? The mouth speaks the things that are in the heart. Good people have good things in their hearts, and so they say good things. But evil people have evil in their hearts, so they say evil things. And I tell you that on the Judgment Day people will be responsible for every careless thing they have said. The words you have said will be used to judge you. Some of your words will prove you right, but some of your words will prove you guilty.”

verses 36-37
hurt like a knife in my side, i am responsible

  • for what i say
  • for who i hurt
  • for how i am thought of by others

my words represent me and i represent Christ
i want others to see me as a light. I want others to look at me and see Jesus. I want my friends to see me as a safe place. to know that i have their best interest in mind, and they can count on me.

forgive me friend if i have hurt you. I would never do that intentionally. Allow me the chance to seek your forgiveness.

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About Chrissy@thePEARLblog

Sinner turned saint. Lover of Jesus. DIY crafter. Mom of 3. Blogger. Friend. married to her high school sweetheart. I blogs to share about the things I love. My hope is that my love for crafting, Jesus, family, and food will inspire you to try something new. If you enjoy what you read, don’t forget to subscribe to my blog!

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